I'm so seriously pissed, i think íf i were having my menses, i'd probably soak 10 packs.
10 PACKS.
SOAKED.
SOAKED THROUGH TIL THEY LEAK.

Blame my foul mood on hypoglycemia.
Or blame it on severe nicotine withdrawal - i've seriously been cutting way way down.
However, the simple truth lies in the fact that i encounter MORONS all the time.

Fuck. Pui. Chee Bye.

I took on an assignment in the hospital today. Being a part-timer, i'm mostly slot in to relief the regular nurse on her off days. 1 good aspect of it, is the ability to work in a wide range of settings and nurse patients with very different diagnoses. It can be fun, but it DEFINATELY can be quite stressful.

Ok, back to my story. I arrived 5 minutes early (0800-2000hr shift). The night nurse (the patient's regular caregiver) passed over her report (for those unaware - this simply means, giving a brief history of the client's medical history and highlighting whatever needs to be done).

In turn.........

That Phua Chee Bye of a prostitute (must be related to Phua Bak Quah in some sick way) came to take over my shift at 8.25pm. I ended up leaving at 8.40pm. And she wasn't even apologetic.

I posed her some questions:
1. Why was the BiPAP machine's oxygen was connected to a humidifier? As far as i know, it ruins the filter (she thought that this was the humidifier) at the back of the unit. She thought i was refering to the humidifier in front. Hello. You got the 2 mixed up, not me.

Her answer : The day nurse has been regularly nursing him for so long. I don't want to interfere in her care.

FUCK YOU. What the hell does that mean? I couldn't be bothered. I switched to the oxygen port directly in the morning. Whatever nurse can do whatever they want, but when under my care, i do it with my conscience on the line, so i jolly well do it my way. Blardy hell, i've had the opportunity to nurse patients on the same BiPAP machine and i even asked the vendor before. None of them were connected to the humidifier.

2. Ask the doctors if the anti-arrhymthia medication could be rescheduled after the patient's dialysis. As far as i know, dialysis will affect the overall absorption of the medication.

Her Lam Pah reply : Huh... ok.

I admit, this was partly my fault. I overlooked the matter. It only struck me when the patient had dysrhythmia later on it the day and i was thinking if anything could have contributed to that. If i could, i would ask him myself. But i'm returning to school tomorrow. Still, i spread the word to the staff around. I do hope someone remembers to ask the doc.

3. I advised her to inform the regular nurse that that anti-arrhythmic is likely to cause hypothryroidism. Especially since this patient is elderly and has multiple underlying health conditions. It might be wise to check his thyroid levels once in a while.

You will not believe what she said : The doctor knows his case lah.

PLEASE! I'm not asking you to force the doctor with a knife or embarrass him in front of everyone. There is no harm in giving a gentle reminder right? Fucker. If i had blardy remembered earlier, i would have asked them myself.

4. She told me that i was not supposed to aspirate the Freka's tube before feeding. "Only NG tube can lor."

Please. Rolls eyes.

For your info, that rule is applicable because the diameter of the lumen is really small. However, this patient's Freka's size is equivelant to a Ryle's tube size 14. Why the hell can't i aspirate to check?

And for your info, NGT (nasogastric tube) is an umbrella term for all tubes inserted via the nose to the stomach. I think, that uneducated woman was refering to Ryle's Tubes. Stupid woman.

It's because of shabby work attitudes like this that really piss me off. You freaking pass to me rubbish. I'm not saying that i'm perfect. I still to learn many things. But i do try my best to find and practice the correct methods. I am so pissed. I do hope i die at home in my sleep for the simple fact that there ARE stupid people around in the hospitals. And this applies to doctors, nurses, cleaner, STUDENTS etc.

I will be more thorough in future. And think of as many worst case scenarios as possible.

And i will be meaner to bitches who cross the line in future. Quarrel then quarrel lor. I'm famous for that anyway.

Some people irk me beyond belief. Good grief, they send my imagination into overdrive. So much so, i feel like stepping on their head with a pair of leather boots till their eyeballs pop out.

Allow me to explain.

Get ready for some serious dose of bitching.

Scenario One - The case of the conniving lazy smuck who tries to pass off as a friend.
I'm currently on attachment with a fellow classmate with a total disregard of whatever friendship or teamwork stands for.

Nevermind she sabotaged us (chicken, far and me) at the last posting.
Forget that all she ever does is hypocounts that last forever.
We can even overlook the fact that she works slower then a snail in slow-mo.

But how can u expect to turn a blind eye when she doesn't repect the essence of teamwork?! This lame excuse for a nurse (and that of a friend) shoves shit to everyone else.

Ie. Asking chicken if she wanted the chance to administer nebulizer.
Real reason : She didn't understand the new order and was too stupid to ask. It is easier to let someone else take over the shit.

Another example - Rushing to serve medicine after her break, when the rest of us were slogging to take parameters and changes. That lazy bitch. She didn't even bother to take over the work so we could go. Blardy hell. Fucker, we need to eat too, you know!

Example 3 - she avoids attending to patients that are easily angered or doesn't speak her language. Pleeeeeeeeease. All patients should be treated equal without discrimination. Freaking rude ones can be tackled with some painstakingly built rapport. That fucker siams all call bells and avoids the patients she labels as 'difficult' like the plague.

And to end my case, the patients, in turn, verbalize outright that they do not want her to step near them. Woohoo..... If i were to list the stupid, ridiculous dumb antics i have witnessed her do in the ward, i may end up with a novel. A whole 100,000 page novel. Thicker then the bible.

Think about it. Nursing, in all it's glory, is all about teamwork. Never a one man show. Especially when there are so many patients under your care. But that bitch doesn't know that. Or maybe, she just doesn't care. Clamouring for the more 'glamourous' procedures like serving medication and her stupid hypocount. You would think that with all that practice, she'll be damn blardy good at those. Rubbish. She takes forever to complete the tasks and shoves the patients who hate her to us. Talk about integrity.

Scenario Two - The case of the heavily made-up, Ronald MacDonald lookalike Bitch who abuses her authority.
Yup. More bitching on the topic of Kan-ni-nah. She's the grandma of all bitches. Makes me just want to whip out my little voodoo doll and stick pins all over and set it on fire.

But that matter has blown over. I'm not letting her get in the way of reaching my goals. She can stuff her face into the sanitizer and lick on shit. Wahahaa.

Scenario Three - The case of the badly trained staff with an equally poor attitude.
This type of people can manifest anywhere. Heck, their work equals rubbish. My advice - please work on your attitude. Efficiency will come with hardwork and organization.

And when there are students attached to the ward, these horrid staff insist on their method being right. I question you not because your modus operandi seems simply ridiculous. I'm trying to be open to reason, by allowing them a chance to state their piece. Although, more often then not, they make matters worse. Because, in the end, not only do they look stupid, they also project the image of mutherfuckers.

Either work well, or don't work at all.

Your Inner Child Is Naughty

Like a child, you tend to discount social rules.It's just too much fun to break the rules!You love trouble - and it seems that trouble loves you.And no matter what, you refuse to grow up!

How Is Your Inner Child?

oh gosh. is this me?

Some serious funny shit. So fabulously apt.

I met my ITE lecturers today. Complained my butt off (cause nothing on my chest to scream off in the first place). They asked me why i used such strong words to describe my dislike. Haiz.. if i was powerful and rich, i'd blabber on and on. Alas, paupers like me can only moan and groan in private (unseductively) or write hypocritical emails to the relevant authorities on the pretence of 'constructive feedback'. Which i did. And will continue to do so. At the very least, i managed to shave off 3hrs of make-up hours from my clinical placement.

I voiced my interest in returning to ITE to teach. The place that started my whole journey into nursing. They strongly encouraged me to return. But going back will be tough. Seriously tough. I don't wish to return empty handed. Hopefully, i can get the chance to get some substantial papers then return, least i become another blabbering idiot that NYP choses to feed. Not to say that they're aren't any gems there. Just not many. The ratio of blabbering idiots and psychotic bitches to gems stand at about 3:1. And i'm sighing again. If this figure continues to grow, i'm going to slam my head into the wall and commit suicide like Bao Gong.

However, i'm glad my classmates in NYP gave me a chance. What started out as strangers has blossomed into a hyperactive, super imaginative frienship fuelled with fun, both at the ward level and in school. Buring hachets and pulling out the knives dug deeply behind our backs, i'm glad that something good has come out from all this.

My friends stop me from overeating.
Stop me from stabbing Fad only doing her hypocount and ignoring call bells.
Stop me from buying more useless stuff.
Stop me from laughing at the doctor's undone zipper. Again.
Stop me from wringing the dark bitch and her abuse of power.
Stop me from pouncing on staff with hormonal imbalances.
Stop me from basically, sadistic murder.

Fara cools me down with all her baby talk.
Suli occupies my time and energy with cleaning up the stream of pee she leaves behind.
Moonie provides me all the info known to man.
Lionel influences me with his lame and sometimes racist jokes.

While Sharon Lee showers me with all her love and her wisdom.
Rick shows me the importance of play.
And Ross balances the scales with constant brainwashing and pulls me back to sanity.

Nothing more i can actually ask for now.
I'm happy. For now. Blardy content.

Well, maybe, entry into NUS would be nice =)
I'm keeping my fingers crossed.
But my legs are wide open.
Though i think that'll be more of a hinderance then help.

Short entry - just like my height. Blast it.

I have just been informed with an amusing piece of news. And i'm still giggling my panties off. Ok, i lie. I kind of expected it. I'm sure you (reading this) would like to share in the info. Sadly, i can't say much. Only that it involves a Baby Girl and a Princess. Wahahahaaa...

And tomorrow is another long day in the ward. I'm toxic there. Most patients i come into contact with collapse. As is, the number stands at 4. I'm soaking myself in 'flower water' to try to dissipate the foul luck. Send me to a shaman. Jesus and moses look-a-likes not included.

Today.
Debate.
Today.
Time for the showdown.

Todays marks closure to the debate saga. Against all odds, somehow, we managed to claw our way into the semis. And to think - we're against the strongest team, our own friends, and representing the same school. How ironic can that be.

They put up a great battle. And frankly, given their eloquence, courage, and wit, they were destined for the finals from the start. I'm proud of my teammates though. Moonie set the tone in her usual prime-minister-ily manner. Fara improved a whole lot, being more organized and focused. Instead, i stank like a sack of rotting oninons. My reply speech sucked so much it became a leech (liability) for my team. Suck. Suck. Suck.

And yes, we lost. By how much, i don't know. So congrats to Halim's (now christened 'XS') team for breaking it into the finals. I have faith that they will win. No doubt about it.

And cheers to the people that showed sportsmanship and actually shook our hands. Well, that caught me off-guard. It was a nice though. And yes, continued thanks to Daddy Lian for all his support and 'promised' dinner treat. I want lobster ah.

On the whole though, i think we did enjoy ourselves. And i guess that's all that matters. With all the 'hard gay' antics and 'say say say' shoutouts. Enjoy - hard gay vids - http://www.youtube.com/results?search=bakafish&search_type=search_videos&search=Search

*********

Let me tell you about the day before:

Last night, i ended attachment late at 9pm. I dilly-dallied, wasting precious time for sleep for gawd knows what. Then i had to drag myself up at 5.50am to head to the hospital for my morning shift. Pure Shit.

I enjoyed the opportunity to interact with the students from the other shift. Most of them, i believe, earnestly worked their butt off.

Me and Fara were allowed to leave a little earlier to get to school - for the damn blasted debate. Yes, the same debate that stirred up so much ptoblems between that Kaninah and me.

Pls - she has so much makeup on her face, she rivals MAC. Ronald MacDonald's that is.

Ultimately, she abused her authority to extend my attachments from the original 7am-3pm to 7am-6pm, for 3 mornings. Piss ass mother-fucker. Yes, i'm seriously super pissed by her. I did sms an apology and requested for a private audience but that bitch flatly declined. I will not bother to make contact with her again. She can stuff her fuck face. I will also email the contents of the sms to the kaypohs who are looking upon this matter. So they can't say i didn't try.

I know that bitch is afraid to face me - in case she gets bombarded with verbal abuse. WAHAHHAA...

Maybe i'll faint in the ward tomorrow. Then i can sensationalize the whole concept to the media. Look at how the school expects a student to make up for hours even while the student is representing the same blardy school, in an official event. Logic-less. And that students from the same team can be dealt with in opposing manners (read : no need for makeup) simply because our lecturer is a butt-fucked, ass-licking clown with an array of garish colours, rivalling that of 10 million opera singers. Please note - she IS a wonder of the world. I WONDER why she looks THAT bad.

I AM WOMAN - HEAR ME ROAR

It's funny how we have Mothers' Day and yet not have a date to celebrate Females' Day. Look at the number of alternate genders that try all ways and means to infiltrate feminism (although i argue that gender involves mentality rather then genitals).

Nonetheless, I'm not belittling the importance of Mothers - yes, we should love ALL mothers, regardless of how loony they are.

Being a female is most definately not easy. Just look at the list of roles one has to tackle :

1. Mother
2. Daughter
3. Sister
4. Friend
5. Girlfriend
6. Wife
7. Employee
8. Employer

The list goes on and on. And how about about the roles that one is EXPECTED to take on.. Like the titles/burdens we carry : (some rather unwillingly)

1. Counsellor
2. Money Lender
3. Tender-Loving-Care Dispenser
4. Tuition Teacher
5. Menses Proliferator
6. Pimple Generator
7. Baby Maker
8. Sex Symbol
9. Fashionista
10. Goddess

We have to fight with our hormones monthly (and shoulder the risk of the ever possible, most dreaded Stained Skirt Syndrome), try to keep up with fashion trends, learn to cook (at least instant noodles and boil water!), fight with outbreaks, fend off bitchy catfights (and behold the ever increasing level of male-bitching), baby our boyfriends/husbands, act cute without inducing nausea (not many has attained this level as yet), always have spare cash for leech family/friends or look even bitchier in front of yr current beau's ex's.

Therefore, it can be confirmed that it IS hard to be a woman. But i never said it wasn't fun.

WARNING - The following entry bears comments that may be offensive for some. Reader discretion is advised. I will not bear, in any way, any responsibilty for any adverse health reactions/resentments after reading this blog. Thank you.

My recent entry regarding the debate heats merely skimmed upon the details that occured on that fateful day. However, word has come around that certain participants, being sore losers, are posting a great deal of twisted, selectively edited versions in their own blogs. Given their cynicism and decreased mental capacities, they have tried to exhibit their displeasure by giving their account of what happened from their own perspective.

Now, now... like they always say - There's always 2 sides to every story.

So mutherfuckers (a term of endearment specially reserved for those guilty), hear hear! You don't piss my friends. You don't ridicule them - especially when you're lame, and your hairstyle looks like it was stolen from some biblical persona.

Case in point -
There's this guy, who thinks he's some kinda hotshot debater. In his blog, he stated that the judge commented that he's delivery was good. And that he slammed my teammate's reply speech. Apparently, he said he was rated the best speaker (or so his overactive imagination can continue to dream).

I question why he suddenly suffered from selective amnesia and forgot to put in other details, such as :

1. His team stating a lamer then lame policy (their policy as govt, This House Will Criminalize Abortion On Demand For Pregnant Mothers Under 18yrs)
2. His team misinterpreting the meaning of CRIMINALIZATION
   The Free Dictionary By Farlex, available online : http://www.thefreedictionary.com/criminalization
   crim·i·nal·ize (krm-n-lz)
   tr.v. crim·i·nal·ized, crim·i·nal·iz·ing, crim·i·nal·iz·es
   1. To impose a criminal penalty on or for; outlaw.
   2. To treat as a criminal.
3. Being (backside) sore losers

Their notion's pure crap. I seriously call into question their stance. So does that mean everyone beyond the age of 18yrs will go off scott free? What happens if the woman's health is endangered? What if the woman is a victim of rape or incest? What is the baby has a serious congenital defect? What gives the government the right to infringe on the right of autonomy over the woman's own body? Doesn't this clearly violate the constitutional rights of a woman's right towards reproduction? Why the hell must parents be informed? What if the parents' agree to the abortion? You going to lock them up too? How will this affect society? Will this then not drive the woman to depression? Will this then not drive the woman to kill not only herself but commit infanticide? Won't the number of abandoned babies rise? Won't this increase the incidence of child abuse? How can you assure the child's safety after being born?

And their policy of mandatory counselling and notifying the parents. Please. They fucked up the meaning of criminalization and still dare blabber on and on about making my teammate blush?! Good grief.

Alas, fate would have it that their team would not only lose once, but TWICE. Haha.. talk about destiny. They lost every debate they participated in. Where then is your glory? oooOOOOooo What has the hotshot, apparently BEST speaker done for his team? Zilch. Pure zero.

One thing though, at the very least, the team we were up against had more manners then the other team their school sent in. The other team(save for the first speaker) had such indecorum, they make Jerrel, who hasn't bathed for days, rolling around in shit and playing with his privates look more civilized in comparison. Oh gawd, my eyes are burning.

This competition IS supposed to be a learning ground for all involved. It's supposed to enhance our knowledge of current affairs, key ethical issues the world faces and to a certain extent, build our confidence to speak in front of an audience and practice social graces. Heck, even i had to refrain from spewing expletives. I bit my tongue so many times, i was practically swallowing blood. Why it morphed into some sort of ego-manical wrestling match baffles me.

Some good things came out though. Both SHS teams made it into the semi's. We bonded with our peers on a higher level. And made new friends with the representitives from other schools. And it made me view Ang Moh Potato in a whole new light - hot hot hot. Wahahha.. Moonie, he brushed against my knee while we were having dinner. You jealous right? Woohoo...

ORBIT-HEAD

Some people just irk me beyond redemption.

Allow me to state my case - go on, indulge me.

This time, it's someone with a particularly large head.
So large, it possesses it's own postal code.

Let's take it a step further.
So large it exterts a gravitational pull to all things that come close.
Pulling them into orbit.
Round and round things fly.
Never being able to break free.
Stuck for a dreaded eternity.

And the particular head comes with an irritating lisp.
So annoying it drives my shit back up my ass.
Forces my ripe pimples to burst.
And armpits to freeze.

I make no sense?
Trust me, Orbit-head's far worse.

I enjoyed my day immensely =)

Woke up late and dragged myself to school for the debate heats (ah, the consequences of staying up til 4am to answer IMs and SMSes). I would not recommend the health hazard to anyone.

The dress code (as advised by Halim), extolled : "Formal. Please wear a long sleeved shirt". Practicing the art of selective reading, I slapped on a white mandarin collared long sleeved shirt with jeans and a pair of birkies.

Fara shocked me wearing this sexy brown slinky dress. Woohoo. Trust her to up the sex quotient. Seriously, with the makeup and side slit showing off her thigh, she was HOT HOT HOT. Now i need to butter Moonie too, cause she'll complain endlessly if i compliment only Fara. So here goes - (forced tone) Moonie, you were mesmerizing lah.

Now on to the day's events. The real drama.

We gathered outside LTK, supposedly to exchange whatever notes we had. It became more like- we stole a lot of notes from Wendy (Bless that lovely, extremely well endowed woman). Then the buxom star and I went to buy food. I aslo helped the others to grab snacks - in the end, they all wanted the same thing - I have never bought so many paus at a single go in my life before.

After rushing through lunch, we headed to the debate arena. Not long after arriving, i got an sms from Chicken - alerting me that our clinical lecturer insists that we do a makeup on saturday for attending the official school function. Chee Bye lor. Go suck yourself. Like a leech. Suck Suck Suck. That lecturer really makes me sick. How can you deny the fact that an official email has been sent to all the parties involved? No one has a problem but her. It is proven that the info was disseminated down because she was able to question us about this on mon. So what the hell's her problem? Daddy Lian says she can go to hell. I totally agree. Daddy Lian rocks.

For the 1st match, we(proposition) were pitted against SIT(opposition). Our topic - This House Will Abolish Capital Punishment For Drug Trafficking. We thought we did rather well. We gave the matter a lot of thought and had a lot of agreeable nods from Joey and Daddy Lian.

Joey gave us some helpful pointers. Even he thought we would have no problems getting to the semis. We thought we would win hands down. Unfortunately, the judge wasn't on the same wavelength.We didn't win. Damn shit. And we sure as hell didn't know why. Wendy was shocked beyond belief. So were we.

That really dampened our spirits. We were previously warned that the SBM team was a force to be reckoned with. Die lor. No chance liao. And so, we continued on with heavy hearts.

The 2nd clash saw us(opposition) against SBM(proposition). The SBM team wore SUITS. I thought i had been transported to a Hong Kong mafia movie set. Apparently, they take the dress code really seriously. Their motion - This House Believes That Abortion On Demand Should Not Be Criminalized. They got their policy warped and in a twist of fate, we emerged the winners. Again, we were shocked. What the hell happened? Don't know. Don't care. Woohoo.

We stayed on to offer moral support to Halim's team. They're really good. Really good. They spoke with such conviction. And their witty ancedotes. Power. The opposing team were sore losers. One speaker even blamed the floor (audience) for the loss (by way of laughing). Please. Their points were weak and they possessed no sense of decorum whatsoever. Rudeness is always displeasing. So stop it. They only have themselves to blame.

For the record, i would like to extend my gratitude to everyone that helped make this work. Namely, my team members - Moonie & Fara, Wendy (our super sex symbol), Halim & his team for moral support, Daddy Lian for believing in us and Joey for all his guidance.

I'm looking at Joey in a slightly different light. He remains an Ang Moh Potato (Senior, that is). But he seems HOT HOT HOT now. It must be the specs. I must be a floozy. Whatever.

Also for the record, i would like to punch the fucking photographer who kept sticking his lens into our faces during our preparation, during our speeches, and everywhere we went. Fara..! It must have been your sexy dress lah.

I'm supposed to be sleeping now, getting ready for the debate heats due in less than 12hrs away. I've wasted the day surfing useless websites (mainly online stores..wahahha) and spent a good amount of time chatting with dear Sharon Lee.

Was supposed to sleep early to charge up for tomorow, cause i haven't done a single bit of research and have yet to decide what to wear. Not that it makes much difference - cause i hide behind a 'uniform' of jeans and tees. But tomorrow requires me to hang up my jeans for a little more sauve. That'll be like a mixing chocolate with bleach. Terrible combo. Gimme back my jeans and slip ons.....!

My point is, after all the distractions, i find my brain wandering worriedly about the wellbeing of a good friend.

I haven't been able to contact her for the whole day. I seriously, i'm worried. Worried for all the hurts that she may be nursing herself. Worried for all the burdens she may be carrying alone. Worried for the loss of control she may be experiencing. Worried that she may be by herself - and i don't like it.

It's not like her to not answer the phone. The only thing i can be assured of, is that she doesn't owe the loan sharks any money. So all the more unlikely to miss my calls. Hmmm..

A little friend will try to call her again in the morning. That little friend cares too. Frankly, we all care. And the people that surround you don't need outward blabbering to know when something's just off.

I'm just hoping she's safe. Perhaps staying over at her aunt's place. Or that the phone's on silent. Or that she's sound asleep. Or preparing studiously for tomorrow. Either that or doing porn. Anything, as long as she's safe. Right now, i can't bother about much else.

Anyway, whatever the case, sweetie, if you're reading this,

know one truth : You'll never walk alone.

I won't let that happen.

Cherlosophy's Current Playlist

1. If I Could Be Like That - 3 Doors Down
2. You're All I Need - White Lion
3. Away From The Sun - 3 Doors Down
4. Feel It - Black Eyed Peas
5. Small Town Girl - Journey
6. Papa Don't Preach - Kelly Osbourne
7. Be Without You - Mary J. Blige
8. I'm Alright - JerryC
9. More Human Than Human - White Zombie
10. Sorry - Madonna
11. One Love - U2 Ft Mary J Blige
12. Saving Me - Nickelback
13. Photograph - Nickelback
14. Come Away With Me - Norah Jones
15. Right Here - Staind
16. Catch Yr Wave - The Click Five
17. P.S I Love You - Lena Park
18. Tiny Dancer (Elton John Cover) - Foo Fighters

The soundtrack to my life....

Ps- apologies to 'Baby Girl' Fara for the initial mis-spelling of a song title. Perhaps due to my subconscious love for watches? Wahaha...

The week has been really hectic. Trust me.

Even though it is widely known that i LIE, CHEAT & STEAL.

A mad rush from west to central and back again. A whole 12 hours of work. 12 hours of responsibilities.

The stress of getting new clients -
- new medical conditions to digest
- new patients to familiarize myself with
- new sets of overbearing relatives to cope with
- new wards and their politics
- and the new need to make my patients & their family trust me

Oh... The headache. The pain. The agony. The drama.

To make matters worst, i am be cursed with a face of a conman. People seem to doubt me.

Allow me to prove my point -

Exhibit A :
I was assigned to nurse Client A. He had been admitted because a craniectomy was done to remove a haematoma he sustained after a fall. He is also bedbound, and had a tracheostomy in site to aid his breathing. Basically, they required me to attend to his hygiene needs, suctioning to remove his tracheal secretions and to accompany him. Very basic nursing care.

However, due to my facial defect(s), the relatives felt that i would not be abe to handle the situation. Or any situation that may arise. Heck, bear in mind - they have only seen me for a good half hour. What an impression i've made.

They questioned my capability and reiterated this to my agent, even though i had replied with a positive answer. To the extent of asking for a change of nurse if possible. A total disregard of my feelings. Fuckers.

Through the first half of the day, they shot curt comments and flashed me wary glances. They wanted to supervise whatever i did. Naturally, i obliged. It didn't bother me - i have nothing to hide.

I had to constantly remind myself : I'm doing this for the money. Again and again and again. It's only a day. Again and again and again. The humiliation i have to endure. And the shit i have to put up with. Dammit. Chee Bye.

Still, i continued. As thick skinned as skin can ever be.

I answered their queries and kept my client looking as fresh as a freshly scrubbed gleaming toilet bowl. Ok.. imagination's into hyperdrive again. By the end of the day, they were asking me if it was possible for me to be their regular private nurse.

My retort? Fuck you mutherfucking chee bye. Ok, i lie. Wahahaa... but wouldn't it have been great if i actually said that. Then again, I'm living in the real world and ultimately need to eat. So i ended up working for them for 2 days.

Exhibit B :
My second client - a retired minister (secular or spiritual, i'm keeping it confidential. You make your own assumptions). Basically, i was just required to render the same amount of nursing care - tracheal suctioning and lotsa lotsa TLC.

Again, his relatives had problems with me. At first.

During suctioning, he desaturated (of course it would, simply because i AM sucking out your air supply - together with all the secretions. sheesh). Being a layperson, she allowed hysterics to get the better of her. I somehow maintained composure with her wailing in the background and regained control of the situation. I ignored her outburst and focused on the client. If he were to drop dead like a fly, i'd be fried too.

Giving clear instructions and reassurance, i continued while she went to call the ward-in-charge. I had no fear - i knew what the hell i was doing. And she sure as hell didn't. The in-charge simply echoed my sentiments. Haha. I smell arrogant insolance.

The night past, and by morning, she was asking me if i was available for another night to look after her father. I could hear the curses float down from the heavens again. Fuck you too. Kena Sai. *flashes middle* Watcha gonna do....

Enough drama for the week. Time for me to rest. I'm nursing myself now. Down with a clogged nose (just like my pores) and rigors due to an irritatingly persistant fever.. i really need the rest.

Exhibit C :
Went to the convenience store at the corner of Far East Plaza to get a pack of ciggies. The cashier had the cheek to eye me and demand verification of age. The curses just grow more and more intense.

Just like a gospel rendition of expletives, raining down from parting clouds during daybreak.

Good thing i have the people i love to end my week with =)

Many hugs to Sharon Lee, for hustling me to install yahoo messenger (so she could show off the uber cool avatar she did), Moonie & Fara for a happening night of debate (even though we were like lambs to slaughter), Deeva for a super extended; mind numbing phonecall marathon (shit 4 straight hrs worth)... and a smile from dear lil rick and mini man.