Hah! And what a day that proved to be.
Our etiquette instructor was a (once upon a time) beauty pageant winner. If I remember correctly, she won the Ms Singapore-World title some time back. She was supposed to teach us how to project a good image and what-nots as my DN’s (Director of Nursing) dream is to have us nurses exude an air to rival Singapore’s pride – the SQ Girl.
(insert song here) What a great way to
She spent a great deal of effort trying to hawk off her tear resistant stockings with a pearly sheen from Japan at $18/pair, hair accessories (bling clips and headbands) at $15 (that she insisted was also made in japan even though the items clearly stated made in China and Korea)and her self proclaimed “super soft” fox hair makeup brushes (quote-at a steal-unquote)$20/set.
You know how much time she spent advertising by the amount of mindless details I can remember.
She also handed out her brochure, which also had seen better (and more fashionable) days. It had the weirdest pose imaginable at the back!
Haha!
After that, she shared with us little snippets of her 'incredibly high flying' (by her own standards and tone of voice) life. Of the formal dinners she attends, of how much she prides her dressing as an act of courtesy and of how she considers flip flops some sin to mankind.
"You know how sloppy Singaporeans are?!"
And she continued to drone on and on about buying LV and Gucci, with comparisons of their service and pricing.
Enough already.
Although the instructor had very clear skin, it had a plastic quality (just like her personality!). Especially since her makeup appeared stuck in an episode of the dreaded “Masters Of The Sea”, Singapore’s answer to Dynasty. *Crush you like a cock-o-roach....*
The final straw that broke the camel's back was when she taught the attendees how to ‘lift’ their hair in an updo using hairspray and a “back comb” technique, One Republic immediately appeared out from no where and started singing, "Stop & Stare". Yes, it was THAT bad.
Hahaha!
And during the hands-on makeup session, I was appalled to see people actually sharing the makeup strewn on the table. Expiry dates and a total disregard for personal hygiene made me nauseas. Some people have acne leh! And goodness knows how many rounds of training the products have been through.
My neurotic mind screamed, "Maybe the makeup is from the 80s too!"
I politely declined using the products (aka bacteria farms) and settled to watch instead cause I could see that she steered clear from using the shared goods herself.
I mopeng, can’t use. Wait infect you. Thanks hor.
She eyeballed me periodically but nothing could make me budge, though I remained the (handicapped) ever eager beaver.
Hahahaha!
Makeup rules to adhere to, hair to be washed in a certain fashion, walking and speech becomes calculated. To me, it eliminates the sincerity in all the activities and are reserved for ladies of leisure. Undeniably not suitable for me.
Who cares if you match blue and orange. Who cares if you burp like a frog calling out for the rain? Or issue fart bombs that is probably responsible for WW2 genocide? For sure, I'll bitch a little, but I'm sure to end it off joining in and having a ball.
If your world revolves around the infinately superficial, then it's your personal choice. I prefer to live mine with a little more emphasis on life itself.
