My Dreams, Not Yours

More often then not, we forget that the world isn't perfect, that the people surrounding us can't read our thoughts or may even not bother to care enough. And abound in it's imperfection, we can only fall upon ourselves to heed the alarm bells and do what needs to be done.

Some time ago, I found myself at the end of the brunt of humanity. A harsh reality check highlighted the fact that people have dreams and although they expect encouragement from you, they are not at liberty to return the favor. It's your dream, not mine.

Some have dreams beyond their years in nursing. With plans for further education, plans for career switches, plans for almost any thing one can imagine. They come to you lamenting how cruel the rest of the world is, how the world doesn’t understand their secret desires, seeking some form of redress or consolation.

And in all human nature, those who seek greener pastures surf through without very much on their mind. I don't balme them. But they forget one little thing.

Their actions have a direct impact on my dreams, with an emphasis like those you've placed on your own.

Some people think I'm driven. Hell, I chose to thrust myself into the whirlpool of technical skills and what-nots nursing brings. Do you really think that it's easy dangling the power of life between my fingers? Do you really think it's easily living up to expectations?

And how can I not bother when my efforts affect others or when grades are shared, even though effort may not be?

Please help me to google this subject.

Nothing on wiki leh.

What do yo expect me to do? What can you do when people come to you with changes the night before presentation? You grit your teeth and start churning out something. Anything, even if there is only a few one-liners to back an entire presentation.

I'm going to sleep now, it's late. 1 am already. See you in school tomorrow...

Sometimes i think people expect too much from me. When they feel stressed, they can throw both hands in the air, snap and shift the load to me. But when i feel stressed, no one wants to do any more then give emotional support. Maybe they think the emotional scaffold will do wonders.

And when history repeats itself over and over again, what more can one seriously expect?

So if you'd look at it from a different perspective, it's not about being driven anymore is it? More so, it's responsibility. Responsibility to your group. Responsibility to your work. And responsibility to yourself.

Why should anyone shortchange herslf? Why should i give you less then what you deserve?

Is it really unreasonable to get angry? People think it doesn't matter to me. How wrong they can be. I've invested a lot of time into these people. It's perfectly alright to be demonized. I've told myself that I won't be a doormat and remain nonchalant. It took a lot to stomach, and it takes even more to walk out.

I don't step on others to achieve my dreams, but sadly, I can't count on others to not step on mine.